I'm sure a lot of you got taught about the old saw, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." I'm going to pretend like I don't know that one; if I don't, this will be an awfully short review.
So that was a movie. That was not. Great.
Obviously the music made me want to just switch it off and do anything more productive with my time. It was bad from the get-go and never really got better. The villain is lame, the villain's henchman is lame, the villain's other henchman is lame, the main character is the sidekick, the main character's kind of pointless and annoying, and the special effects make me think that the walking trashcan from Star Wars was inspired by comparison.
I was going to go off on this long spiel about ice cream here, but that will wait. For the moment.
Were there any good things about Ladyhawke? The cast seemed pretty good. Mouse has some clever (if one-sided) repartee with God that I rather enjoyed. The joust/duel at the end was pretty awesome. Throwing a claymore? Cool. The castles? Actually awesome. The idea behind the story was a bit poignant, but there was absolutely no payoff whatsoever. They both stand in the room and then someone says the curse is done and just like that, everyone's fine. The bishop might have like five lines in the whole show, and spends almost the entire climax just standing there with an almost-smug look on his face. I didn't see the need for the monk to be a drunk, and I think I'm going to stop here for a moment and say it's a mark of how much blah this movie was that I don't remember peoples' names.
I've got nothing more for this one. It felt like someone thought they were being hip or stylish or artsy and just tossed away a lot of money on a forgettable movie. And forget it I shall, forthwith and forsooth.
You know, if you don't already have some basis in Robin Hood, that might be necessary for films like this. At least just the animated Disney version.
ReplyDeleteThat was the one where they were foxes, right? I saw that years ago.
DeleteYeah, sums up about my feelings. Who had you watch this, anyway? I'd relegate this movie to advanced studies, at best. It's not very good, nor is it so bad as to be amusing, it's not wildly popular, it doesn't get a lot of external references... Overall seems like a day that could have been spent on something that contributed better to your, for lack of a better word, education in pop culture.
ReplyDeleteDrek like this, the Dark Crystal, and Willow was all we had for fantasy in it's era (aside from Conan). You went in because you liked Rutger Hauer (an acquired taste at best) and Matt Brodderick (fairly solid comic actor) and were hoping for a War Games or a Blood of Heroes. You didn't expect a Blade Runner because no Ridley Scott.
ReplyDeleteGo see "The Road Warrior". Now. And see why Mel Gibson still gets to keep making movies, despite being nuts.
But but but... I love love love the Dark Crystal, Ladyhawke, and Labyrinth (as well as Willow!). They were awesome! They were neat. They were good movies. I still watch them and make my grandchildren watch them with me. I do not like The Road Warrior. I will watch Thunderdome, yes, but that's due to the fact of no rape in the beginning and not so much realistic violence. (And don't even ask me about the movie before the Road Warrior, which details just why Mad Max is such a hardass, and why he doesn't mind killing you as easily as looking at you.)
DeleteThough I now recognize that this is a fairly terrible movie, it does have some major nostalgia points for me.
ReplyDeleteI remember seeing TV ads for it when I was a kid, and watched it at home with my family when it came out on VHS when I was about 9 years old. From a very young age, my brothers and I were big fans of D&D and fantasy stuff in general, and as the above poster mentioned, there weren't a lot of good fantasy movies back then (that my parents would let us watch lol). We LOVED this movie!
Add in the fact that my grandparents had a copy of it, and we watched it at their house practically every time we visited, and yeah - major nostalgic points in my book.
I guess sometimes the circumstances under which you are introduced to a movie, regardless of its intrinsic characteristics, go a long way towards determining whether you'll like it or not.
Ladyhawke? Eh, definitely second-rate, lightweight material from a time where medieval fantasy was severely limited by inadequate effects, and so generally didn't have much faith placed in it by the studios.
ReplyDelete20 years ago, when I was your age, I was a D&D player too. And I was terribly frustrated by the fact that there was nothing on screen that approximated the imagery of the game. It would take another few yeara for that to happen, in the form of Lord Of The Rings. And Now, Game Of Thrones is taking the genre to a more brutal, Machiavellian level. So watch those two, for some far meatier stuff.
Ew. Ew. No Game of Thrones. Ew. :-) Ok, I started playing D&D in 1974 (yes, first year it was published) and I've been reading fantasy and SF since the early 1960s and I still don't get why anyone wants to read such horrible stuff. Or watch it on TV. I'm an idealistic soul, playing lawful good characters (and always have), and I like my fantasy to be upbeat and fun and full of good people fighting the good fight. It's just so much more enjoyable that way. I know your mileage will differ, but there are folks who like the lighter fluffier and more romantic/mysterious/do-gooder characters. Because we do.
DeleteLadyhawke is a guilty pleasure of mine, even though I trained as a medievalist and will quibble the hell out of other movies when they get the details wrong (do not ask me about Excalibur -- just don't! Nasty piece of work, that movie, in the costuming and behavioral senses). But for some reason I adore Michelle Pfeiffer and Rutger Hauer in this beyond all reason, and I love their doomed love and angst and the happy ending. I even love the crappy music. It is pure romance for me in a "it's the best love story" kind of feel.
ReplyDeleteBut, but...
DeleteMerlin: Looking at the cake is like looking at the future, until you've tasted it what do you really know? And then, of course, it's too late.
[Arthur takes a bite]
Merlin: Too late.