Sunday, July 13, 2014

The Big Lebowski: First impressions

This movie inspired a snort of disdain from Roomie. A snort. Of disdain. Plenty of people I know like it, though, so that's a thing. I'm on board for giving it a go; I understand the recommend came from a good and trusted source. At any rate, I've got pizza, an orange pop and absolutely zero context for what this film is about. A large Polish man, maybe? -ski is Polish. Enough dallying, let's hop in. :D



Now there's some charmingly old-timey music. Don't here that anymore.

That's a southern accent if I've ever heard one. Is this "the Big Lebowisk" ?

The Dude. I wouldn'\t self-apply that either. Just saying

So that's LA. Always wondered.

Haha. "In her damned undies"

Tumbleweed is pretty stupefuing

Early 90s. Thank you.

That's a man in a bathrobe and slippers

I don't think he fits in to that SPECIFIC place. In his PJs.

Lazy. I like him already. THAT lady does not, I doubt very much

did he just write a check for less than a dollar

Well that's somehWHATWHAT THEFUCK WHAT

STOP PUTTING HIM IN A TOILET

I think he owes them money

AHAHAHAHAHAA it's down theres omewhere, let em take another look

Did they seriously just loanshark the wrong guy

A golfer?

Hahaha "at least I'm housebroken"

Could fucking apologize or somrthingTITLE annnd we're bowling.

I like seeing the names roll by. They mean nothing to meSTEEEEEERIKE! but it's nice to pretend

basically I look to see if any of them are names I recognize from, you know. My movies.

You know what? When I get back on my legs, I want to go bowling. I like bowling. Everyone likes bowling. Nobody's good at it but nobody has a bad time.

Now there's a fella has some creepy eyes, I tell you what. Hello Donny.

Hello Walter. Yes I suspect you are frequently talking about unchecked aggression.

HAHAHA "Chinaman is not the preferred term"

So Walter and Donny are clearly very good friends

YEs that is his name, I think that's the point

They peed. On the rug.

Must be disorienting to see accolades in "your" name

There's a spot of brown on your nose, guy. You'll want to do something about that.

My question is HOW DID HE GET INAHAHAHAHA that is a nice mirror. I would love to have that mirror. Hey there wheels

"Really tied the room together"

That's a word I don't know

The Dude minds, man.

Wrong terminology, big guy. Asian-American. Talk to Walter, he'll set you straight.

Rectums, sir. Not bums. You should know.

AHAHAHAHAHA YESSSSSSSS and that's how you steal a rug. At least Captain Brown-Nose knows to call him Dude. Now who's this, the wife?

She can't blow that far, you know. That's not a euphemism at all.

THAT'S the lady?

Wait his name IS Brown? That's hilarious. And Lebowski is literally married to a whore.

"I didn't rent it shoes" hehehe

HAHAHA "This is bowling, there are rules"

THAT WOULD BE A GUN

A WORLD OF PAIN, SMOKEY

Well it is a league game. THAT MAN COULD USE SOME ANGER MANAGEMENT, YES?

Hehe. I could say that about so many people. You're not wrong, just an asshole. Wait were those cops there for HIM?

Calmer than you are. What a shit disturber.

I suspect Brad wants a rug back. Who's this fella

The rug is HA HA HA not a problem.

Oh wait he was serious what the hell

I don't understand this movie. It's funny, sure, but what

"Dude."

I'm with you, dude, it's the junk. Honestly, though, if you're a guy in the head, that's where it really counts, right?

Strong Men Also Cry. Felt like it deserved the caps

I was saying this is MOODY. Mellodramma is I think the word

If you ransom a prostitute, does that make you a pimp in some way?

"Well, dude, we just don't know." Could you be any more potato chip, guy?

That man is licking a bowling ball. I don't understand life anymore

Annnd now he's dancing about it. I think I just found our extremely nutty villain.

Antagonist. Whatever

Oh so he's actually A Pervert. That's grim.

"Shut the fuck up, Donny"

20 grand. Nice.

"Rug-peers did not do this." Am I going to have to describe every othe rmovie this way from here on out?

FINE DONNY YOU'RE A WALRUS WHAT THE HELL

what the fuck is Kintano doing with his ball

I see a guy like that asking me that question, I assume I've become a prison bitch

Told...? Nobody fucks with Jesus, I guess

WELL HOW ABOUT THAT you need to invest in some home security, dude

Yeah that's why we can't fly, it's because we hold bowling balls WELL HOW VERY RAIDERS OF YOU

Your beepy wants you dude

OH COME ON WHERE'S HIS RUG

Walter I think you're being A Problem sir

Annnnnd there it is. You're being very un-dude, dude

Now I'm curious, because I've seen some Marx Brothers, some Three Stooges, some Abbott and Costello - does a briefcase full of undies count as "funny stuff?"

 MAN BROUGHT AN USZI

Well this is just a festival of how to do everything in the absolute wrong way

There's another id right there FUCK IT LET US BOWL

ANSWER THE PHONE

Walter you have a problem with BEING A COMPLETE IDIOT

Keep holy the man's Sabbath day, folks

So they stole his car. With the money. For the ransom. Thay they didn't pay. This is a festival of utter accomplishment and WOULD YOU ANSWER THE DAMN PHONE

GUESS WE CAN CLOSE THE FILE ON THAT ONE

So you steal a rug... to get a guy to come see you

A dude, rather

THE dude, rather ratheTHIS IS CREEPY SOUNDS FESTIVAL RIGHT HERE

THE FUCK

I DISAGREE WITH WHAT JUS THAPPENED THERE

STRONGLY VAGINAL. YOU DON'T SAY.

"Please wipe it off."

A ZESTY ENTERPRISE. YOU DON'T SAY.

So her stepmother is a nympho, he stole her rug that he's not allowed having for a DFFERENTY reason than just theft, he's watching a porno with a psychotic half-naked flying feminist with an interest in the zesty enterprises of the vagina. This all makes so much not sense

One hundred thousands bones. And clams. What's he drinking ohhh they're getting tiled WELL THAT'S NOT OPTIMAL

We've been frantically trying to reach you, dude. What a potato chipNOTHING IS FUCKED?!?!!

The royal we.

I'm with you, sir. He's blathering.

Really? You're waltering him?

Feed. The monkey. I don't think so.

"That had not occurred to us, dude." Shut up, Not Donny.

I WILL NOT ABIDE ANOTHER TOE.

Can someone just very mildly kill Walter?

Like just a bit? BEFORE HE GETS A TOE

Of course you're staying, you're an asshole. It saddens me to know that people like him really exist NOW which Lebowski's being voerdramatic with the candles and whatnot?

Well that's suboptimal

what the gfuck is that thing

WHAT THE NO HELL WHY NO IS THIS HAPPENGIN DO STOP WITH THIS

He's going to cut off your Chonson

This is a rough week for you, isn't it dude

So they peed in his car too

 Pretty sure Nazis threatened something on a level above castration, eh?

SHUT THE FUCK UP WALTER

Nobody needs Walter's form of sympathy.

Oh hey, old timey music!

AND A COWBOY

EPIC STACHE MAN

You know, I swear a lot too. Man's got a point.

Phones and the dude are never good YOU DID NOT GO TO THE DOCTOR. YOU WILL BE PUNISHED.

Heyo pencil-stache

I don't get the implications of "cleft asshole" in this context

Look Gigglestache, go dunk yourself

AGREED, DUDE

Ahan with the phone

oh god dammit it's contagious through phone lines

I don't follow what just happened there. I'm getting very lost again

EVERYONE'S FAVORITE VOLSKWAOGN IS BACK

FESTIVAL OF ACCOMPLISHMENT, dude

Oh hey a note! or a book

pr a book report. Aghain I am just so lost AND NOW A SHADOW IS DANCING except it's actually a naked man covered in weeds

Oh not you again. Shut the fuck up both of you

Why are they going to whatever place and goddammit I want a burger now

Okay so they're after the kid who wrecked the car then THAT is a nice vehicle.

 It's sinister how perfectly rational he seems at te front door WHAT IS UP WITH THE TUBE MAN

YOU DON'T SAY. HEALTH PROBLEMS

Bad cop worse cop here, and I don't mean bad like evil AND WE'RE GOING FOR THE CASTRATION AGAIN THEN

 What IS he doOH WELL THIS CAN BE GOING NOWHERE GOOD

That's not the kid's car is it

DO YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS LARRY

Who's a genius I'm a genius also to be fair the dude's car is sort of already dead

Though bludgeoning weapons are quite effective against the undead. +1 Crowbar of disrutption

WHY WERE WE NOT AT THIS POINT BEFORE

 Who the hell is Jeffrey Treehorn

annnnd there's a topless lady and an orgasmic beach gent

So lost

Jackie Treehorn. Gotcha. Called him Dude. AND THAT IS A SWEET SWEET PAD

OH this is the loan shark

I keep forgetting parts of this movie exist

Seriously though this is a nice PAD RUBBING YESS I LOVE THAT TRUCJK AHAHAHAHAHAHHAA


AHAHAHAHA TOLD VIA PAD RUBBING

I don't think he does, no

he just sicked mob goons on a 15 year old

YOUUUUuuuuuu got drugged

Tied the room together, eh?

Goddamn I love me some pizza.

Oh look. Visual innuendo through bowling

annnnnd we're dancing

That's whathisname Iran guy Saddam

No. I refuse to comment on any of this.

NO I REFUSE TO COMMENT ON ANY OF THIS.

scissors

ohhhh right they want to cut off his Chonson

Is anyone except me and the Dude sorry the Duekd and I NOT insnae right now?

He would like Bill Counselorman

HE TREATS OBJECTS LIKE WOMEN, MAN

You are clear... ly a fan of the word jerkoff

Yet another student of the Kyle Reese school of talkig ou authorities

Oh you've gone and fucked right up now

Yep. Vweeeep WELL THERE'S A FAMILIAR PROSTITUTE

ten toes and all!

Man stop blaming poor Christ for this shit, THAT one at least was your fault

her again. Annnnnd we're stripping.

EVERYTHING HAPPENED TO HIS HOUSE

or rather EVERYONE.

EXCEPT Jesus. He had nothing to do with this.

What the blazes is she doing

OHO so he's busted too!

WHA

Okay... uh... well... I suppose as plans go, that's a quite excellent one when you get down to brass tacks

SABBATH,GUY

annnnd Volkswagon

Way to be incognito who are you supposed to be

You're definitely a dick. TERMINOLGOY, YOU WILL GET IT RIGoh well who the fucI AM RIGHT THERE WITH YOU DUDE

do we have enough factions in thie mix yet? This isn't fuckin what was that setting Planewalk

THE TOE

Am I getting explanations

Well then that's a SHUT UP POTATO CHIP

The war is on now

shut up Walter. We will use you later

what even was that word

Ohey

Oh this is goinna be a laugh isn't it

Oh it's on now

If he's not he's gonna be

Alright you misread that one

A single pin really is like a middle finger, isn't it

The man in the black pyjamas is a worthy adversary?

No I'm pretty sure the Sabbath DOES matter to Jesus. One of them does anyway

Which group was this now. Rekilled, dude. Rekilled. They're playing strange music.

WE DON CAR WE STILL WAN THE MOONEY

Oh here it comes it's on the thunder is coming out of the sky you going to cut off his Chonson too?

BOOOM THAT WAS A BOWLING BALL TO THE CHESTannnnnnnnd he's eating that man's ear

You will be fucking nobody in the ass today. Thank you come agaWHAT THE HELL Donny is a casualty of pure unadulterated stupid?

holy shit he really did die

and now Walter's trying to start a war with a funeral home

they've got him in a coffee can

Welllll that just didn't go your way at all did it

Won't feel the same without shut the fuck up Donny. Just saying

STACHE

The dude abides. Indeed.

What

Things didn't work out good, things worked out shit

No shut up cowboy, resolve the story

WHAT DID I MISS THAT BROUGHT ANY OF THIS TO AN ACTUAL RESOLUTION

 Right well I'm just I don't even... like... okay. No. I'm going to go do something else and then maybe tomorrow I'll try to ruminate on just... what. I don't even know.

16 comments:

  1. "Now there's a fella has some creepy eyes, I tell you what. Hello Donny."

    You may appreciate http://chickswithstevebuscemeyes.tumblr.com/

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is my second-favorite movie of all time.

    "Brandt" "Jesus Quintana"

    The thing the Dude is drinking is a cocktail called a white russian. Vodka, Kahlua, and milk. It's pretty good, when you're old enough to drink, like an iced latte with booze. I recommend trying one.

    Lot of strands in ol' Duder's head. Lot of things to keep straight.

    This movie kind of benefits from watching it a second time so that you know what's going on and can see the bigger picture, so to speak. No, nothing really got resolved, but this is a movie about the journey rather than the destination. And about the Dude, who is the man for his time and place.

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    Replies
    1. When he's old enough to drink? He's 19 and in Canada. I think his main limiter right now is meds, not age. ;)

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    2. Is Canada's drinking age not 21? Huh. Learn something new every day.

      I'm serious, though, Jeremy, it will make much more sense if you rewatch it, without the distraction of taking notes.

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    3. I'm of legal age, yeah, it's the drugs and the healing and whatnot that prevent me.

      I think the movie honestly made as much sense as it's ever gonna.

      Delete
  3. You ought to watch more Coen bros. movies. A lot of them are great, like "Fargo" and "True Grit." Many of them are pretty strange, just like this movie, but to varying degrees.

    Oh, and this movie inspired a religion. Dudeism.

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  4. Wonderful Noise, just abide.

    http://blobtoblog.files.wordpress.com/2011/01/abide.jpg

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  5. To expand on Rachel's comment above: Coen Brothers' movies are nearly always about "true" nihilism. "Things happen, often without explanation." Lebowski is a pretty solid example of a "typical" film of theirs.

    Here's a thing I wrote about this a zillion years ago: http://www.gaijin.com/2008/09/on-the-coen-brothers-and-nihilism/

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  6. The Coen Brothers made some amazing pictures- Fargo, Miller's Crossing, Raising Arizona, O Brother Where Art Thou, Burn After Reading, The Man Who Wasn't There... The True Grit remake even.

    It seems you didn't care for this one. Belive me, there's more to them than this thing.

    ReplyDelete
  7. The Big Lebowski is basically a noir crime film, which I don't think you've seen any actual examples of, with a hippy stoner and his bowling buddies as the protagonists instead of a hardboiled private detective. So some of the confusion may stem from not getting the subtext. Although it's a hilarious movie in its own right - the pinnacle of the Coens' comedy library, IMO (although O Brother is also hilarious and lovely in a completely different way).

    What resolution was the movie lacking? The movie doesn't necessarily spell things out for the audience in the way that most movies do (i.e. hit you over the head with the plot over and over), but the pieces are all there. The whole kidnap/ransom thing was a ruse. Bunny disappeared (to Vegas) and her nihilists pals were using that to try and extort 1 million from her husband. Her husband was trying to use the situation to steal 1 million from his charity. The Dude was just a useful patsy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There was no outcome to it all. Like I said in second thoughts, what ultimately happened in the movie could have been any moron. I don't know why I'm looking at this one specifically, except that he's a bit more quotable than most.

      Delete
  8. The Nihilst guy is Peter Stormare, a swedish actor who likes to play odd roles. He has a larger role in Fargo (the movie, it also has a TV-series on HBO that's about as good as the movie). It's johnson, slang for dick if it wasn't obvious.
    The music during the drug scene is Kenny Rogers, normally a country artist but he had his acid period in the 70's(?). I think watching this as your first Coen brothers film may have been a mistake because there are others that are more straight forward and will clue you in on their humour more.
    Haakon

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    Replies
    1. The TV show's on FX, not HBO.

      And I think he recognized that, he was just running with the accent.

      Delete
  9. Jeremy, you may take some flak from the internet today for not totally giving your life over to this movie, but I'm in your camp. It's a movie that kind of demands to be watch drunk or high-- its cult didn't develop until it hit home video-- and while it's undeniably well-made and some of its seeming nonsense is actually thought-out quite thoroughly, it's never rung my bell the way RAISING ARIZONA does.

    The thing to understand about most of the Coens' films is, they're always laughing at you. Their universe is absurd and arbitrary, and if you think you've detected some profundity in their work they'll happily remind you that you're only watching a movie and none of what you're seeing is real.

    That said, there are some valuable connections to be followed. A great deal of LEBOWSKI borrows from the LA-centric noir writing of Raymond Chandler, and his "The Big Sleep" ought to be on your reading list, along with the Humphrey Bogart film in case you haven't seen that.

    And then there's CUTTER'S WAY, a magnificently downbeat film from the early 80s, in which a younger Jeff Bridges plays essentially the same character in a similar setting and situation-- he even has a loose-cannon war-vet buddy egging him on.

    Speaking of Walter, fun fact: the character is based upon John Milius, who directed CONAN THE BARBARIAN.

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    Replies
    1. I'm always high. Technically. Is it a high if it's actually doing pain-killing work? Not clear on that.

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    2. I'm no expert, despite a recent prescribed encounter with Percocet, but I think it's only a "high" if one is taking a given substance recreationally.

      Delete